Spiritual Pepto

“Inaction, contrary for its reputation as being a refuge, is neither safe nor comfortable” ~ Madeline Kuhn

I have been known at times to divide the entire human race up into Pepto and Non-Pepto people…

When I was a kid, Pepto-Bismol was a family staple.  I was shocked then, as I moved out into the larger world, to discover that some people refuse to down even a teaspoon of its chalky pink goodness.

“No way, “ they say, “It’ll make me throw up.”

And, to this day, I look at them confused, because, in my experience, that’s kinda the point.  Pepto-Bismol either makes you feel better or it makes you barf and THEN you feel better, but at least you’re no longer lying around on the bathroom floor, clutching your stomach, and wishing to die.

ACTION is where it’s AT!

But what do you do when you have spiritual/ emotional indigestion?

There are times when our unhappiness is caused by our refusal to take action on our own behalf…. but at others there is no obvious action to be taken.

What then?

(I can hear my Buddhist friends reminding me that the real cause of our unhappiness is attachment to specific outcomes – and yes, I acknowledge that this is true, but non attachment is the work of a life time, and, sometimes, the thick of a good ol’ fashion soul flu is the least likely place to begin practicing.)

So what do we do when we are clear that action must be taken, choices must be made, change must occur, but we aren’t in a position to act?

One of my favorite authors of all time, Anne Lamott, frequently writes about her own struggles with exactly this issue.

“I have a lot of faith. But I am also afraid a lot, and have no real certainty about anything. I remembered something Father Tom had told me–that the opposite of faith is not doubt, but certainty. Certainty is missing the point entirely. Faith includes noticing the mess, the emptiness and discomfort, and letting it be there until some light returns.” (Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith)

Ultimately, there is always a shift, a dawning of enlightenment, that comes which allows us to see the moment in a new way or from a different angle, but until that time comes, the most we can do is nurture ourselves as best we can – eat well, put ourselves to bed, exercise, be gentle with and forgive ourselves.

Because as much as we might wish for movement of any kind, it is ultimately in our best interest to stay exactly where we are – on the metaphoric bathroom floor – until we have clarity or at least a real impulse to move.

There is no spiritual Pepto that will hurry these moments of divine distress.  What we can do is sit in our stuff, be with it, learn from it, and, to paraphrase my friend Anne in her book Traveling Mercies, wait for the next right circle of light to appear.

“Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself” ~ Zen Proverb